The past few weeks have been very frustrating. As we all know, nearly all crime in Utah is committed by illegal immigrants. If you don't believe me, just wander over to KSL.com and read the comments. Granted, KSL doesn't always say that a suspect is illegal (what are they hiding?), but come on--like we can't tell? Latin surname? Duh. Brown skin? Illegal until proven otherwise. It's not racist. Assuming that everyone with an Hispanic name or appearance is an illegal crime-committing immigrant from Mexico is just covering the bases.
For the past few weeks, though, KSL has been wasting our time with so-called "crime" stories that don't involve the real problem. Hence, we've been getting pictures like this:
SEND HER HOME! Sorry--instinct. Or we get this:
Van Dyke? Is that German? Send his grandparents home!
What's so interesting about that guy? Or this one:
So the wife of a big-time BYU basketball player is DUI on prescription drugs. Like that's news.
By our count, 21 mug shots in a row were for people who did not appear to be illegal. One of them was named Orozco -- an admission of guilt if ever there was one -- but he turned out to be a legal resident (which some liberal judge probably used as an excuse not to deport him). We were almost giving up hope that KSL would start covering the real story until tonight, when we saw:
SEND HIM BACK TO MEXICO! Is he from Mexico? Well, just look at him! Is he illegal? Just look at him! Unfortunately, by the time I saw the mug shot and rushed over to KSL to urge that he be sent back, I had already been beaten to the punch by other giddy commenters. Oh, well. I'll have more chances. I'll just check back tonight and--
Damn it. Well, some illegal probably put them up to it.